Chronicles of a SAHM, Journaling

“Faith without Works is Dead”

I ask for the Lord to use me daily -to be a light for others to see His goodness.  I also ask for the Lord to bless my creativity.  My heart is always in the right place, just not my head and for that reason, I have made a very costly error in not moving when the Spirit tells me to move.

A year ago, I was blessed with an idea that could make a huge impact in the world. I only told my husband about it because I didn’t want anyone else to steal the idea.  I worked on it for about a week, but allowed my finances to be an excuse to not continue.  I looked for patents – none were found – not even pending. I knew that I would have to hire an attorney and then pay for the patents.  The costs seemed to keep piling up, so to add another bill was just not a smart thing to do (flesh talking).  But God gave me that idea, right?  I knew the Lord wouldn’t bring me that far and leave me.  So, I did the easy parts; bought the supplies, created a journal to document the ideas over time and I even tried to make it myself.  Then, I put it all in a drawer and left it alone.

Some time later, my husband asked what I was going to do with my idea.  I told him that I needed help with drawing.  He told me to try it on my own.  He told me to add the free apps to help me with drawing. So I tried.  I worked on it for another week or so, then lost interest.

I always kept in the back of my head, thinking…”I need to work on that” but then, I didn’t for one reason or another -“It’s too expensive,” “I don’t have time,” and “It’s no longer needed.”

Late last night, I opened my facebook page and what was staring at me in my face?  The idea the Lord gave to me.  Except, it didn’t have my name on it…deservedly so.  It was on a major news website. I couldn’t even be upset. I could not even cry.  It was my own fault. The Lord supplied my needs according to my faith, but as it said in James 2:14-26, “Faith without works is dead.”  He handed me bread to eat because I was hungry, but I didn’t eat because I was too lazy to lift my hand to my mouth.

I can only pray that I do better when given another opportunity.

I decided to write about it today because I believe it’s important to share my trials just as I share my testimonies and so others dont make the same mistake.  Keep the faith, keep praying and keep going- don’t quit.

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Chronicles of a SAHM

Why Can’t We Be Friends?

I was having the conversation at the studio the other day with some of the dance parents about how our kids love to hug each other.  Whenever they see each other, it’s like they haven’t seen each other in years.  They can’t stop hugging, holding hands and giggling but they’ve only known each other for a few months.  One parent told me that hugging isn’t even allowed at her daughter’s school – because touching others is not permitted.

It hit me and the other parents simultaneously.  Why can’t adults do the same thing?  Why can’t we just go up to people who look interesting and ask them to be our friends?  Our kids do it all the time and it works.  We have so many hang ups and prejudices and misconceptions about people we don’t even know. I’m sure we’ve missed out on so many possible friendships by being afraid of the unknown.  When did that end? IMG-7439

My daughter entered preschool two years ago and met the most amazing little girl.  They are “besties” to this day.  Although they now go to separate schools, they keep in touch by phone, Facetime, with play dates and Girl Scouts. The friendship is so pure and innocent. 

I was also blessed with a friend because by our daughters becoming so close, her mom and I have established an amazing friendship.  They’re part of our family. I don’t believe I would have met her otherwise, which is sad. However, I’m thankful to know her and her family. IMG-8087

So now, I plan to be more open to speaking with people in the airport, at the grocery store or at my daughter’s activities because I never know what type of interesting people I may be missing out on.  Now, my quest for you today is to go out and make a new friend. 

The world needs more love.

Chronicles of a SAHM, Journaling, Lavender Fields Creations

Uninspired

I find myself feeling totally uninspired. This is quite a contradiction as I am writing this because of a sudden inspiration to tell the world about how uninspired I am. (Weird)

Anyway, years ago, it was easy to put together a paragraph, a page, or a chapter. Now it’s difficult to even string two words together without having to use a dictionary. Inspiration used to flow from my fingertips onto paper, later to a keyboard where words were given life – like water – to anyone who would willingly partake of its goodness. I loved to write words describing my life and every intricate detail – it was juicy.

I don’t know if it’s the dis-ease that I have now which makes me mundane, dull, lackluster and oddly droll, but I want more. I want my old life back. I want laughter and dancing. I want poetry and fiction.

I want to feel life but how do I do this? How do I get my groove back?

Chronicles of a SAHM

Giving Praise

This morning I woke up with so many problems on my mind and on my heart.  I keep trying to figure out how I’M going to get through some of my issues. Then, I heard all the birds outside chirping and singing – just making a lot of noise – beautiful noise though.  I was kind of irritated because they had taken me away from my thoughts.  So, I started wondering about what was so important that they had to wake up that early in the morning with such a ruckus.

Then it occurred to me.  Birds wake up giving praises for being carried through the night, for waking up in the morning able to see the sun, being with family, for not being hungry and for the ability to fly. Well, at least that’s my interpretation.  There’s a lot that we can be upset about, but there is so much more to be thankful for. Keep giving God praise. He’s brought you this far for a reason.

Love, Me (and the birds)

Chronicles of a SAHM

Definitely a message for me today!

cross at sunsetBut may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you. http://bible.com/114/1pe.5.10.nkjv

Chronicles of a SAHM, Thinking of Mom

My Roots

I’ve had my mom on my mind for days. I miss her so much. She passed in January and it’s been so hard for me just realizing that she’s not here. I was so used to being able to call her just to say hello- knowing she would be there.

My friend wrote on her Facebook page the other day about how much she misses her grandparents and her parents. She said that although she has a strong group of support from family now, it’s not the same as having her roots. It’s what I had been trying to verbalize this whole time. I don’t have my roots. No grandparents, no parents – It’s just me. There’s no parachute, no Plan B. If I fail, then I fail and it’s just me – but when I succeed… well at least I can give them thanks. Thanks for raising me to be who I am. Thanks for giving me the love and guidance I needed when you were here, and thanks for introducing me to God.

God has been my rock. He has been my shoulder to cry on in the middle of the night when my support team is asleep. He’s always awake and He always listens.

He also let me know this morning that I now have to follow the examples of my parents and grandparents. I now have to become “the roots” for my children. I have to instill in them the goodness of the Lord. I have to establish in them, a foundation in Christ. If I didn’t have God in my life right now, I know that I wouldn’t make it. Life has dealt me some pretty hard blows, but I’m still standing…But God. I give Him the glory and the praise. He is the reason I woke up this morning.

So today will be my Day 1. I am going to embrace the lessons I have been taught by my “roots” and I am going to share them with my seedlings, so that they continue to develop and grow into the Light.

good morning.

Lavender Fields Creations

New beginnings…

In November of 2014, I began a new journey.  I opened a jewelry business – Lavender Fields Creations!   I’ve been making jewelry for a couple of years, but last year I began making more and more quality pieces.  My husband noticed that my interest in making jewelry had spiked and suggested that I start a Facebook page.  It was the scariest thing I had ever done.  It’s one thing to create art – regardless of the medium – and have people other than your immediate family and closest friends to comment on your work and quite another to have complete strangers commenting and liking your collection.   It was extremely frightening.  

 
I initially opened it up for just a few friends, but then my husband posted a link to my page on HIS page.   So, I had to make it public.  I had so many views and likes that in just a week, my views had gone from thirteen to over one hundred.  The only problem was that I wasn’t selling anything.  People were making all kinds of requests – “nickel free” “smaller pieces” “larger pieces” “real gold.”  
 
I tried to maintain a list of all of the requests, but even after making some of the custom pieces, they didn’t make any purchases.  
 
I opened up an Etsy page and on the first day – a sale!! How exciting!  It was for a pancreatic cancer awareness bracelet that I made in memory of my father.  I immediately checked the bracelet for any imperfections, then packaged it up and mailed it.   
 
Since that sale, I’ve gone through a personal tragedy and have not been able to keep up with my pages.  I just lost my mother at the end of January to brain cancer.  She had been fighting cancer for a year and a half.  So I eventually unpublished the Facebook page and I haven’t updated my Etsy page in weeks.  
 
Beginning the Monday following her memorial service, I plan on reopening my poetry page AND my jewelry page on Facebook, updating my blog at least once a week, updating my photos and jewelry on Etsy and getting back to business.  
 

I would like to leave behind as big a legacy for my children as my mom did for me.